Stepson Remembrance

Thoughts on My Stepfather - Kip, by Reid

When I was a young boy growing up in New Orleans, I was at a point in my life where I was discovering all about the development my first circle of friends. There was a dance next Saturday at the school. The varsity football games were on Friday nights and we would play our football games on the next field over, listening to the cheering crowd, pretending the praise was for us. We were rough and tumble boys who thought grass stains and scrapes and cuts were badges of honor. I had just kissed my first girl. Life was wonderful.

Then, Kip entered into my life.

At first, I didn't know what to think of this man. He would just show up on our front porch. I knew that mom would be happy when he came in to town. From where?.. Houston?.. Texas?.. Urban Cowboys? Geographically close I knew, but might as well have been Mars. Why was he coming every weekend? Does my Dad know about this? I knew that my mom is single now - whatever that means - and Dad doesn't live here anymore. Am I the man of the house?

Eventually, my uneasy feelings would fade as I realized the fact that Kip brought so much happiness and comfort to my mom when he was around us.

A while later, I was introduced to his family when they all came to town. For some reason or another, I began to understand what mom saw in this man because I was now happy when he would visit. The warm feelings between the families were instantly evident and soon after, mom told me that she was going to marry Kip and we were going to live with him on Mars. There were no friends on Mars as far as I knew, much less the girl I wanted to kiss again. I didn't want to go.

I didn't realize it then, but I was going to have a grandfather for the first time in my life.

When we arrived in Houston to start a new life, I was terrified at the ripe old age of twelve to find new friends and new things to do. There was a new school I would be going to and I would be the stranger. I became resentful and probably said some things to Kip that I shouldn't when mom wasn't around. How childish I was. How loving, patient, and understanding he was. Always.

Once I came around and recognized the fact that not only would he be my stepfather, but a kind of big brother as well. I'll never forget going to my first concert with him. It was 1982 and Van Halen was coming to town. He wanted to go as bad as I did and off we went. Kip and I could finally relate to one another through music. I always took it for granted that I was able to explore my own musical horizons when I was allowed to have a drum set in my room and play unrestricted and free - six steps away from their bedroom. He never once told me to knock it off, although I'm sure he felt pressure from the neighbors. I got better with lots of practice and still play to this day. Inspired by the Kipster.

Later on, I was graduating high school and moving away from the house that I was so happy to be raised in. There, I made so many wonderful friends - that would all agree - that Kip was an unbelievable guy. My friends were his friends. There was constant laughter and love. All who came by for a visit, whether long or brief, could feel it. I was lucky. It was our home, and it was spot free.

Many years later, I realize that I am a very wealthy individual largely because of Kip. Not money, or possessions, or tangible things, but things I've learned through his way of making people happy, important, appreciated, and loved. His example set, is to me, the reason I have my close friendships with so many wonderfully diverse people. I could not have asked, or wanted for anything more.

All in all, Kip was my best friend.

By Reid, Kip's Stepson